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PE Discussion

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PE Discussion:

Dr Brett: So Ali, tell me about your premature ejaculation problem.

Ali: Well it’s really an embarrassing problem that I have had for a long time, and its getting worse now that I have a new problem. I’m not sure how to stop it. I feel very attracted to my partner so it’s become very embarrassing. Is it true that this problem affects many men?

Dr Brett: Yes, you’re right actually. About 40% of men will suffer from premature ejaculation at some point during their lives. It often starts in the late teenage years or early twenties, but it can actually star at anytime and many older men can suffer from premature ejaculation when they haven’t had it previously.

Ali: But why is it happening to me?

Dr Brett: Well there can be a number of reasons. Quite often it’s due to nervousness, particularly if you are in a new relationship. Anxiety can also cause it, stress, being in too much of a hurry, feeling pressurized, being upset with something in your relationship or perhaps you have some unsatisfactory early sexual experienced. In older men it can be an indication of prostate problems as well.

Ali: Ok, so I haven’t grown out of it yet. What can I do to help myself?

Dr Brett: There are a number of things you can do to help retrain your body and there are some exercises you can try. There is the stop start technique, the squeeze technique and Kegle exercises which help to strengthen the muscles in your pelvis and so improve your PE.

You can try to stop technique on your own initially and then ask your partner for help. You should do this regularly for a couple of weeks at least.


  1. Start slowly to stimulate your penis, stop just before you think you are about to ejaculate
  2. Rest for a minute until the feeling of needing to ejaculate passes
  3. Repeat these steps at least five times. Then allow ejaculation to happen
  4. The squeeze technique is easier with a partner, but its not easy and you will need to work at it.
  5. Your partner masturbates you up until you are just about to ejaculate
  6. They then firmly squeeze the top of your penis
  7. The feeling of needing to ejaculate should then die down


The Kegle exercises work with the muscles in your pelvic floor. They aim to strengthen the muscles around your penis and help to improve your control. The Kegel exercises are best done everyday.


  1. First find your pelvic floor
  2. Imagine yourself stopping wind from passing from your bowel
  3. Then imagine stopping yourself from urinating
  4. Sit stand or lie down and slowly squeeze these muscles
  5. Hold the contraction for 5 seconds
  6. Release
  7. Repeat fifteen times
  8. Then start faster exercises, this means doing the same as above, but tightening your muscles quickly and not having a five second hold
  9. Repeat these fifteen times


You need to do this for a minimum of three months, but the good think is that you can do them pretty much anytime anywhere. You can do them while waiting for the bus, reading a book, sitting at home watching television at night or even just before you go to sleep in bed.

Ali: What if none of this works? Is there anything else I can try?

Dr Brett: Other things to try are talking therapies. This can be talking things through with your partner, or looking for some professional sex therapy. Just talking about a problem can help it improve. Either speaking to a GP, or looking at the website for the college for sexual relationships may help.

It is possible to try anesthetic creams that slightly numb the penis and can sometimes delay ejaculation. Using a thicker condom such as the ‘Durex Performer’ that has a built in anesthetic cream might also help.

There are some antidepressant medicines that are actually prescribed for this problem. Dapoxetine or Priligy is a medicine used to treat PE. Even if you use medicines you should still do the exercises too, as medicines don’t cure you, just help you when you use them.

Ali: Ok, so I am not alone then. I can have a chat with my partner about it and try out these exercises. If the problems still persist its good to know that I still have options.

10997 Published February 2013

Review Scheduled February 2014

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